lobel's

thought fantasy was about to be realized

the other day a hot firefighter-dude beckoned to me. i looked around and mouthed, 'me?' he nodded, so i strolled over, wanting to keep my cool. he said, 'hurry it up--can't you see the truck pulling in?' did not realize i was standing in front of firehouse.

parents, caffeinated/wasted

visiting my parents, who are sensitive to caffeine and booze. i kind of want to feed them four loko. just as experiment.

fighting with gps

my parents always fight in the car. if one says left, the other says, 'right, i tell you--riiiiiiiiiight!' they got a new car; now they both fight with talking gps.

even tsa don't want this

when tsa first announced its pat-down/scan policy, i didn't know what all the hubbub was about. in fact, i considered sending them my resume. anyway, today i flew for the first time since and was looking forward to some added excitement. alas, security stood aside while i strolled on through. insulting is what it is.

crocheted meat

cuddly meats.

rajma masala not good

indian food gave me nightmare swedish friend had afro, acne and stick arms and legs and was about to force his greasy, bony self on me but stopped and said, 'mommy?' i'm neva EVA eating rajma masala again.

meat mural

black friday

last night around 11p in cold and rain there was a HUGE line for the best buy on broadway to open at 5a. i thought i also should wait for wutever life-changing thing they got fo cheap. 

bacon in bed

we meet again, hangover. shaking fist with one hand, eating bacon with other.

charlize theron

theron is tall, blond, beautiful. she's also busty (unlike rachel zoe & co.). all the things i'm not--she's even employable. when people talk about tattooed eyeliner, etc., i say, 'if i'm gonna get a cosmetic tattoo, it's gonna be of charlize theron's face.' so, you can imagine my ambivalence, appreciation and demoralization, when i noticed these huge posters of charlize in the subway station. (i wasn't wearing glasses and am blind without them, so there is slight chance it was not charlize but betty white, or whomever.) anyway, i shook fist at giant charlize, big nemesis.

danish meat

went out with some girls i met in danmark. brought back memories.

me ftw!

thought i was woefully unproductive yesterday, nursing hangover, but in the final hour i managed to eat phallic meat to make day worthwhile. go, me.

meat on meat