pulling hair

i joined an online dating site. excited, i thought, 'let the fuckathon begin!' although so far it's less a fuckathon and more a slow, faceless correspondence. finally i did go on a date, and the dude had passable looks and was semi-literate and not a total bore. (score!) but he did do this weird thing: compulsively pulling lint off my shirt, etc. and he pulled my hair when we were saying good-bye, but i took the physical gesture as encouragement.

snotty surfer

when i saw all the hot, towheaded surfer dudes in san diego, i thought to myself, 'there's no way i'm leaving this beach alone.' sure, the ocean caused boogers to stream out of my nose and for me to pee a lot, but i thought these might make good icebreakers.

 

wet wetsuit

also while i was in san diego i realized my lifelong dream of trying to surf. luckily my friend was there to give me tips. tip #1: she said, 'in order to stay warm, pee in your wetsuit.'

rudey and houseboy

when recently i was visiting friends in san diego, my friend, rudey, invited us all for drinks but left as soon as we arrived. this rudeness might have annoyed us, had he not left us in good hands with his roommate, houseboy.

we drank all rudey's booze, then explored his living quarters, which perhaps due to his military background were scarily organized.

so we moved shit around.

when rudey returned the next day, he was distressed about the one-shelf switcheroo.

at first i was surprised, but then remembered he'd always been sensitive.